Praying Your Best Life
A Workshop to Pray Your Goals
In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps. - Prov. 16:9
Youth, employment, retirement…and then you die. It always seemed a rather dreary way to think about life, especially when my own retirement appeared like a dark and ominous cloud on the horizon. Thankfully, I picked up Arthur C. Brooks’ “From Strength to Strength” and found a new way of thinking about my life. The clouds gave way to a brighter view.
The first twenty-five years are about preparation for life: growth, learning, and education. The second phase of life is about building a family, a profession, and a life of their own. The fourth chapter of life is the final twenty to twenty-five years. That put me squarely in the third chapter of life, which is a bit of a bummer. But I still have two more chapters of life, which was encouraging. It was also challenging. How could I implement this approach?
Last week’s post focused on setting goals according to our chapter of life. As a follower of Jesus, that is an important step. But there is another. How do I hold these goals loosely so God has the ultimate say in my life? Though I am by no means passive in my life decisions, I want God to write chapters three and four as he has chapters one and two.
I have found that regularly praying for my goals embodies the wise words at the beginning of this post. The rest of this post will describe, specifically, a tool I have found very helpful in supporting this habit: a prayer book.
This post is a self-guided “workshop.” I am going to share the details of my own prayer book so that you can read with pen and paper in hand and adapt what follows for the goals you have developed in your chapter of life.
First, list your goals. Here are mine from the last post:
Positive experiences with parents.
Help our parents to develop a rhythm of life that strengthens their self-esteem.
Strengthen my relationship with my sister Jeannie, with whom I work, to provide care for our Mom.
Be present for Lucas and Karren as they move through chapter two to overcome life’s landmines and challenges, and to support them as responsibilities grow.
Support Sam in chapter one.
With my wife, Cheryl, to be safe people who provide a safe place for Sam, Lucas, and Karren to share, enjoy, and express their feelings.
Use whatever wisdom I have to provide financial support for my family.
Steward our resources so we can live for others.
Next, determine the major headings for your prayer book. Here are mine:
Inspiring quotes
Prayers Answered
Open Prayer Requests
More specifically:
Section 1, Quotes:
An ever-growing collection of quotes that inspires me to spend time in prayer. Here are a few examples:
An inspiring definition of prayer: “…the personality of the believing man laying old as with arms and hands upon the reality, and grace, and power, and attention, of the personally known and personally loved God.” -H.C.G. Moule, Secret Prayer, p. 55.
The goal of prayer:
"…a heart that is nourished neither by the world nor by fantasy, but by him alone.” -Jean Pierre De Caussade, The Sacrament of the Present Moment, p. 2.
“…the recapture…of the revival fire of the love of God which led the Apostle Paul both to withstand the Apostle Peter, when necessary, to his face, and also to impart his very life to those whom God has sent him.” -BFC Atkinson, Valiant in Fight, p. vii
And a quote that serves as a practical preparation for my times of prayer: “Come now; little man, turn aside from your daily employment, escape for a moment from the tumult of your thoughts. Put aside your weighty cares, let your burdensome distractions wait, free yourself a while in him. Enter the inner chamber of your soul, shut out everything except God and that which can help you in seeking him. Now, my whole heart, say to God, “I seek your face, Lord, it is your face I seek.” -Anselm, Proslogion1
Section 2, Prayers Answered:
I keep a growing list of prayers God has answered, including the date I began praying and the date they were answered. This reminds me of the importance and efficacy of my time spend praying. For example:
On 3/11/18 I began to pray for a good result of a legal action related to a family business. That prayer was fulfilled in a positive judgment three years later.
On 8/17/18 I began to pray for the funds to pay off our mortgage. That was fulfilled when the above prayer was answered.
Other prayers answered:
10/11/17 and 11/1/2018: For my sons to make the Christian faith we raised them with their own, and for them to take steps to go deeper in their relationship with God in college and beyond. To date, both sons are actively involved in their local churches. My wife and I are so thankful that our sons are experiencing the relationship that has been of the highest importance to us both.
On 10/13/18, I began to pray for a fully funded retirement for my wife and me. In 2024, I crunched the numbers with our financial advisor and realized we were well on the way to achieving our goal.
On 5/5/19 I began to pray that Lucas, my oldest son, would meet the perfect woman for a lifelong partnership and build a family that will glorify God. On 12/2/23 Lucas and Karren were married!
Section 3, Open Prayer Requests:
This is where I arrange my goals for this chapter of life. Beyond simply listing out the goals as prayer requests (above), I like to add Scripture passages, when appropriate, that I can pray along with the requests. For example:
2/16/2026: Request: Positive experiences with parents. Specifically, (1) wisdom and good relationship with my parents so they develop a rhythm of life that strengthens their self-esteem. (2)Strengthen my relationship with my sister, Jeannie, as we provide care for our parents”
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. ‘Honour your father and mother’– which is the first commandment with a promise – ‘so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.’ -Ephesians 6:1-3
2/16/2026: Request: That Cheryl and I can provide the support our youngest son, Sam, needs in chapter one of his life.
“Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.” -Ephesians 6:4
2/16/2026: Request: That we steward our resources in a way that allows us to live in a way that benefits others.
“ For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was ill and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.”
-Romans 25:35-36
Once you have begun developing your prayer book, set regular times to pray. You may want to begin with one day a week and build up from there. However frequently you pray, start with something manageable and grow from there.
Finally, remember Jesus’ promise:
I say to you: ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. -Luke 9:11
From “The Prayers and Meditations of Saint Anselm with Proslogion, translated by Benedicta Ward (Penguin, 1973, p. 239)
The tangible example of your own prayer discipline is so helpful.