Building Your Life
Chapters of Life: Chapter Two
“Gain all you can, save all you can, give all you can.”
-John Wesley1
I. Definition of Chapter Two Through Story
She was in tears as she came into my office in South Carolina. I was the associate pastor, just about her age, and we both had young children. “I can’t get through my morning Bible reading and prayer, she cried, without falling asleep!” She had developed the habit of morning time with God in the first chapter of her life. Now that she was firmly in chapter two, that habit wasn’t working anymore.
Though she didn’t see it, she was doing very well in the second chapter of life. The second chapter of life is about building an independent life: a family, a home, a profession, and financial security for the future. It’s an exciting time. It also takes an incredible amount of energy. In chapter one, this young woman had been responsible for preparing herself for chapter two. Now that she was in chapter two, her responsibilities had changed. She was succeeding in her new responsibilities.
We spoke together of the shift from chapter one to chapter two and how it would impact her relationship with God. Then I suggested that, though she was eager to continue the habit of daily Bible reading and prayer, perhaps more sleep would be more important for restoring her strength as she deepened her relationships with her husband, her baby boy, and her co-workers.
Our oldest son, Lucas, has entered the second chapter of life. He has graduated from college, taken a first job, overcome a challenging work environment, searched for and found a second job, started saving, married our amazing daughter-in-law, Karren, lived with her in multiple countries around the world, moved back to New York City, and serves, with his wife, in their local church. That is just in the first few years of chapter two!
II. Key Practices for Chapter Two:
Though you need a lot of focus on the life you are building, be sure to pay attention and learn from others. John Wesley’s advice to gain, save and give all you can, is helpful not only with financial goals but with relationship development as well.
Take responsibility for your life, particularly in three areas:
Faith: The faith you build early on will become the foundation of your family in years to come.
Family
Profession
Finances
Set objectives for this chapter of life that will facilitate life in chapters 3 and 4. For example, under finances, you would do well to develop and follow a budget, live off 70-75% of your annual income (including giving away 10% off the top), and begin saving and investing to take advantage of compound interest.
III. How People in Chapter Two of Life Can makegoodhappen with those in other chapters of life:
Another challenge in chapter two is finding the balance between opportunities and a lack of experience. Though you are going out on your own, you are not alone. Family and friends in other chapters can help you to unlock opportunities and gain experience, just as they have already had to do. Here are a few suggestions:
Honor those in chapter four of life. Their lives, in ways recognized and unrecognized, have already had a huge impact on where you now are in chapter two.
Learn from those in chapter three. They have a lot of experience that you do not have, which can help you step over “landmines” as you go through this stage of life. They are still at least somewhat familiar with the advances, technological and otherwise, that you are facing.
Be a role model for those in chapter one of life. Know that they are watching and learning. It is encouraging to share with them how you got through chapter one, what you wish you did in that stage of life, as well as what you are learning about this new chapter that they will soon enter as well.
IV. How other chapters can help those in Chapter Two:
Chapter one: Offer to help with things like babysitting, running errands, or bringing over dinner.
Chapter three: Shift firmly from chapter two to chapter three of your life. This enables you to offer support to those around you who are working through the challenges of chapter two. Watch for more details on this in the “Simplify Your Life” post on Thursday, February 26.
Chapter four: pray for family members in chapter two. Let them know you are praying for them and ask for updates on how to pray and other ways you can support them.
Bonus: What does a faithful chapter two look like?
My command is this: love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. -John 15:12-14
from his sermon The Use of Money.